Monday, April 18, 2005

It's on

So I'm walking the dog this morning when I see the cute girl in the sports car. She's not very far away and she looks at me. She smiles, says hi, and WHAM. Something hits me on the ear, rolls off my forearm and lands on the ground in front of me.
It's white. It's bird shit.
Son of a motherfuckin' bitch.
I AM GOING TO KILL EVERY ONE OF YOU GODDAMN BIRDS!!!!!
She was still looking at me. She was laughing hysterically as I made a beeline for my apartment, dragging the dog behind.
So now my objective is clear. The pigeons in my apartment complex must die. All of them.
Any ideas how to do this without getting caught?

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