Wise old sayings

It's a beautiful day outside and I'm stuck in this hole. Two days ago they were predicting snow and now it's bright and sunny with highs in the mid-50s. Like they say -
"If you don't like the weather in Texas just wait a minute and it'll change."
Here are a few other pearls of wisdom often heard in the Lone Star State.

Don't name a pig you plan to eat.
Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.
Words that soak into your ears are whispered, not yelled.
Don't sell your mule to buy a plow.
It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
Don't squat with your spurs on.
Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.
If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
Sometimes you get and sometimes you get got.
If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.
Only cows know why they stampede.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.
You can't tell how good a man or a watermelon is 'til they get thumped.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.